Akosua Rona 6: Vogue And Vibes

Hello again my people! Been a while since our paths crossed. I trust you are keeping well and staying safe. Over here, Baby Bero and I are gradually settling into a rhythm. If you didn’t know about Baby Bero, this probably means you don’t follow the blog on Facebook and IG. Today is a good day to remedy that. All the filla dey there! 😉 If this is the first post you are stumbling on, this is Part 6 of a 10 part story series on life in Ghana during the COVID-19 pandemic. As always, happy reading and see you in the comment section!

‘So you were not in love with grandpa when you got married?’, Aya asked in between bites of the freshly baked rock buns her grandmother had offered her.

‘No, I respected him. But love, that came with time. by the time we had a second child which was barely 2 years after we got married, I had begun to fall in love with him, with his kindness, with his interesting way of apologizing, with his laugh. That was a different time. I respected him and more importantly he respected me. These days you young people place so much value on how well he dresses and how much money he spends on you, instead of emotional intelligence and kindness. You prefer – what did you call it- packaging. Anyway how is that Michael guy you’ve been seeing?

‘Definitely no mutual respect there, just vibes and packaging.’

‘Vibes? That’s a new one. You come up with new terms every day. Okay so how about some pancakes?’

‘Grandma, you just gave me rock buns. You keep trying to make me gain all the weight I lost during the lockdown in just 4 days.

‘You don’t eat well enough and you spend too much time calorie counting. You should fight with your mother more often if that will make you come and visit.’

‘She’s just too old-fashioned, she can’t let me live my life. I can’t wait for her to realize that I am 25 not 5. She has a problem with every single thing I do.;

‘Well, I don’t know about old fashioned. I just know that banning you from going for parties where people don’t have masks on is wise and prudent. Imagine if you had the virus and didn’t realize it, you would have passed it on to your grandfather and I 10 minutes after entering this house. With your grandpa’s kidney problems and my weak heart, only God knows how badly the virus would have hit us.’

Aya started panicking as the truth in her grandmother’s words sank in. Two nights ago, she snuck out of the house to go for one of the parties her mother had said no to. Nobody in that air conditioned room was wearing a mask and some of them took turns inhaling shisha from the same mouthpiece.

What have I done?


‘You mean to tell me a nose mask, a simple nose mask with sequins is 600 Ghana cedis? Bɛɛ virus ɛ ebaagbe mi!’

‘Oh customer, don’t talk like that. We have to take our time and sew it well. The detailing is a lot. The design you want us to copy isn’t a simple one. We also need to thread the sequins and the beads one by one, and this is also short notice.’

‘You, it’s okay. I will wear the blue nose mask everyone wears like that. It won’t cost me more than 10 cedis. It is not like this customized nose mask has the breath of life in it.’

‘Oh madam. This your nice dress dieɛ, we can’t add blue nose mask oo. The custom made mask will be really nice with the dress. You dieɛ bring 400.’

‘Which part of the I don’t have that kind of money do you not understand? Sanitizer is taking my money, Veronica bucket and soap too. And yet my business loses money everyday. Nakai 400 ɛɛ I can do a lot with it.’

‘I understand. The Covid is worrying all of us. So many people have called to cancel their orders because their events have been postponed. The only thing that is selling is the Fellow Ghanaians cloth. Ahaaa, by the way, I also sell face shields masks. That one also protects your eyes. That is even better. You can slay and still show off the make up.’

‘But doesn’t that expose your nose and mouth area? Do you have an agreement with the virus? Has it signed a contract with you?’

‘Ole noko? It is okay. Sorry for left.’


‘He has stopped picking up my calls, Ako. It has been radio silence for 5 weeks. Unless he is dead or in a coma, there is really no logical explanation for this.’

‘When was the last time you saw him?’

‘Erm, just before lockdown. After that, we were mainly chatting via Telegram and Snap.’

‘Mmh so no text trail.’

‘Ako, I am going crazy just thinking about it. Every week during lockdown, I was sending him stew and soup via dispatch. He even had specifications- no shrimp powder, more goat meat, extra pepper. And now no call, no reply, nothing.’

‘Wait, was he paying for this?’

‘Don’t make me think about this mistake again. No he wasn’t. I was buying the ingredients with my own money. Well, he paid for delivery.’

‘Ei! Wahala for who no fall in love before! I hate to break it to you but you were just his lockdown chef. Also, judging from all those specifications, he should be well able to cook his own food oo. Well, what do I know?’


‘This Covid help me pass!’

Isaac smiled and shook his head, silently praying that his boss would return from the bank soon so that this security man would stop running his mouth.

‘Eeeh?’

‘Oh yeah. Ebi now wey I dey chop my post proper.’

Isaac’s eyes were following a girl who looked like she was pretty. With the masks these days, you couldn’t really tell. He realized that the security guard was waiting for his response.

‘Really? How-‘

He didn’t even need to finish his question. A few people walked up to the bank and Isaac got to see Mr Security Guard on show.

‘Madam, stand back. You have to wash your hands first.’

‘Boss, let the mask cover your nose.’

‘No, you can’t use your own sanitizer. Use the one here.’

‘Mommee, your temperature is high oo. Let me check it again.’

‘Chairman, one by one. Relax.’

Isaac did his best to keep the laughter from spilling out.

Regardless of who walked towards the bank that day, they had to do whatever Mr Security Guard said in order to enter the building. Before Covid, they would probably have not given him the dignity of a ‘Good morning’; now, they couldn’t even access their money without his say so.

No be small post you dey chop ampa.


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3 thoughts on “Akosua Rona 6: Vogue And Vibes

  1. Yay you’re back!!!!🥳🥳🥳 I’ve really missed your stories. I hope you are not “disappearing” again and that you and Baby Bero are here to stay😊. My weekend is off to a good start! Have an amazing one❤

    Ps: I don’t comment often but you coming back is something worth commenting🤗

    Like

  2. Good read, well done Keni! Really liked the 600ghs saga and security man post stories – I can relate paa 😂.

    Like

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